Monday, February 6, 2012

Those missing weeks

Wow. I've been gone from here for a very long time. I stopped writing because originally this blog was for my family and friends in Minnesota and since I came back to Minnesota for a visit I guess I thought there wasn't any reason to write.

A couple of days ago I thought "Oh no, what about all those other people who read and aren't in Minnesota? They probably want to know what I'm doing here." I doubt that's true, but just in case I'll put down a brief history of what I've been doing while I'm in Minnesota. So for my friends far away and my friends here in Minnesota that I haven't had the chance to connect with, here is a summary of what I've been doing since the middle of December.

I arrived back in Minnesota on December 16th. There  wasn't much snow but it was pretty cold. Well, to me it was really, really cold, but I live in a mostly Mediterranean climate now. I miss it. It would be nice if it would actually snow, I mean really, if it's going to be cold it should be white out there too. On the other hand it has been wonderful to travel to see friends without dangerous roads and freezing temperatures.

I've been staying with my parents. They have been gracious and thoughtful and I couldn't ask for a better situation than I have right now. But I am 50 years old. It feels strange to be living with my parents again, albeit briefly. I started out on the couch because my room upstairs was cold and the couch is right in front of a lovely fireplace. When Leif came we moved upstairs because the couch isn't a hide-a-bed and the floor is uncomfortable and covered in a carpet circa 1979 (I kid you not).

Since Leif left again for Italy I move between the two rooms. It's like visiting another place, if you have an active imagination. Which I do. When I'm downstairs I'm at a cozy little B&B. When I'm upstairs I'm at a lake cabin, complete with old posters on the wall and furniture the family didn't want in the "company" parts of the house and boxes of stuff too good to throw away but not nice enough to use. Throw in some cobwebs and dust and Asian beetles tastefully cocooned in paneling and you've got every cabin north of Motley. It's like going on vacation.

I spent the weeks before Leif arrived sewing my wedding dress. Yes, I may in fact be crazy, but the nice kind of crazy. I finished the dress with days to spare (thank you very much) which was good because there's a lot to do getting ready for a wedding.

Leif came here for three weeks in January. I think I'll write that up separately. It's definitely more than a footnote to the visit here and deserves to be told in detail and with pictures. I'm looking forward to writing it.

Since he left on Monday I have been feeling weird. Jet-lagged, almost. Tired and a little nauseous and cranky and headachey. .I think I'm lonely. I'm homesick because home is in Florence now. I'm sorry if that upsets people who consider Minnesota my home because I grew up here. I could trot out some tired phrase like "home is where the heart is" and my heart is in Florence, but even that isn't totally true.

My past and everything that makes me who I am is in Minnesota. But my present and who I am becoming are in Florence. I can't wait to get back there. The longer I'm here the more I realize that this is true. But until I can leave I'm going to enjoy the hell out of Minnesota and my family and my friends. I promise to write about those things that can be shared.


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